Raffles: A Chapter to Remember

WARNING: THIS POST IS GOING TO BE VERY LENGHTY. EXPLICIT LANGUAGE USED.

11th of June was my graduation day while 13th of June was my last prom night. So with those, my education years in RCS have ended. Three years have passed and i’ve finally made it until the very last end.

I still remember how clueless i was at the end of grade 9 when i had to look for a senior high school prior to graduating junior high. Out of nowhere my parents told me to look for an international school in Jakarta and i had no idea which school to apply to. So i had a few options and out of those, RICS was one of them yet RICS was actually my last choice lol. Despite the costly fees of most international school, somehow my parents chose RICS considering that the price was relatively cheaper and it’s the nearest to my house. Then i thought RICS wouldn’t be so bad since they have really nice uniform (like the Korean style lol). Even since i was still in primary, i was already familiar with RICS from looking at huge ad poster near my lesson place and also some of the people from my lesson. In addition, i had personally known some people who were RICS alumni such as my brother’s friends and my friends from previous high school and they gave me good reviews so with no doubt, my parents applied me to that school.

It was not a direct admission though, i had to take the entrance test which consisted of English and Math. Meh, English was just a piece of cake but the math.. holy shit what kind of alien work that i had to solve. I was already suck in math, no, i am always suck in math so as expected i couldn’t do anything other than writing nonsense even tho i was allowed to use calculator (it was totally unexpected and in the end i used my phone calculator lol). Not too long after the test, the result came out and of course i failed the math test and i had to redo it. Guess what?  Even after my second test, i still failed and they gave me another chance and some time to prepare for the math test. So my parents bought me a Cambridge math book and even asked my brother’s friend to give me a math lesson every Saturday. It took me another month to prepare for the test and when the D-Day came, even when i thought that i was a bit more prepared, i still couldn’t do it well. As a result, i still failed the math test yet they actually accepted me as a Secondary 4 student with one condition that if i was not able to catch up with the studies then i had to go to Secondary 3 (which also means repeating another year for me).

Okay, before i officially became a RICS student, i had big expectations in which i wanted to be the “cool kid” who can make a lot of friends and be popular. On the first day of school, i was totally out of my comfort zone and overwhelmed with the brand new environment that’s gonna be my new home. I came from a national school where i did not converse in English at all, meanwhile starting on that day, i had to speak in English all the time to everyone. Fine, i guess my English was not that bad but my confidence was. I thought it was gonna be easy making friends on the first day of school but it turned out to be a major flop. Everyone basically had their own squad to hang out with so it was very awkward for me to blend in with any of them. I did try talking with some people but meh it was just a pointless chit chat. So i was literally an outcast for about the first two terms at school. Oh, and the curriculum there was totally different with what i’ve learned in my previous school. Well, duh it’s Cambridge what did i expect.

Making friends was hard and so was catching up with the lessons. I did struggle at some point in class but somehow i managed to keep up with the tests and assignments and actually my results were not bad at all (except math and accounting – crap). Although sometimes i still had difficulties in socializing with people that even i had to spend almost every break time just to stay in class or eat sneakily somewhere.. haha those were my miserable moments that i could never forget. Yet, day by day, i tried to talk more, maybe one day i would talk only to one person then the next day i would try to hangout with some other people. I found socializing very awkward but i had to do something if i want some changes. Then i started to make friends with some people who had same interests with me and i just spent more time with them which eventually made us closer. It’s only until term 3 that i finally had some “friends” in school. I was still pretty much in contact with my old friends.

There were times that i was actually a victim of bully and there were rumours going around the school about me. It was unpleasant and depressing af, what the hell i was not even close with anyone lol. But i tried to stay strong like my mom always told me “don’t be afraid if you know that you did nothing wrong”. So after sometimes, i managed to keep myself cool and eventually karma hit that bitch (yea right).

But then things got harder when it was time for IGCSE preparation. I had to do time trials until late, do past papers everyday, and so many tests. I was very tired and my results were not that great. I got really stressed out to the point that i was making a paradox. I thought to myself that maybe if i didn’t get into RICS from the start and go to a national school then maybe my life would have a better outcome. I could imagine how many friends that i would have, how it would be much easier for me to catch up with the studies, how i could be involved in many school activities and extra curricular, etc. Well, all i could do was just dreaming. Of course it was too late for me to change route.

By the time that IGCSE came, i really didn’t take it seriously and thought that it was easy to get A considering that my mock exam results were okay. So i didn’t really study hard and just put “enough” effort that i think would give me good results. How stupid i was, the results that i received was even worse than expected. Sigh.. i thought that IGCSE is kinda useless for me anyway.

At the end of sec 4, i finally got a bit comfortable with my “new family” and even though i was not really a part of any squad (like i was still an outcast) but at least it’s safe to say that at least i could genuinely talk and blend in with (almost) anyone. So that was pretty much a win-win situation for me huh. Tbh i was the closest with the Japanese girls (they’re the ones who actually approached me since the first day of school <3) then the foreigners and lastly Indonesians (idek why lol).

Okay, moving on.

I passed sec 4 and i continued to Junior College 1. A year has gone by and it was another year for me in RICS. Sadly, many of my friends and other students left before and during JC1. Yet, several new students came in and joined the RICS family. I still remember how i tried to make friends with the new students and relate to them for “being the new kid” but they were doing fine without me and even better lolol so embarrassed of my (old) self. Hey it’s not bad to try and be nice with other people right? Actually i got much better and happier during my JC1 year compared to my sec 4. I had some good friends to hangout with regularly (got my own squad ftw) and got less awkward with other people as well. I tried to be close to as many people as i could even tho with only a small chat. I guess things got better for me and i got much more involved in school activities. Although i was still “no one” in school haha but i was fine with it as long as i could be happy myself i didn’t even care to be someone popular or not.

But there was one memory in which i felt like shit during my JC1 year. As you know, previously i was in a relationship with this guy that i’ve been close with since sec 4 but unfortunately he moved as soon as we graduated sec 4 so we were in long distance relationship up to more than one year. There were so much drama going on between us and a “third party”. I was completely crazy in love and we were such a lovey dovy during our honeymoon months until shit happened and he decided to break up with me at our 100th day. I broke down in tears, cried a river, my heart was literally hurting and i got sick until i didn’t even come to school for a few days. Yeap, that’s how bad broken heart can be and it was legit real.

Anyway, one of the most hilarious memories that i could recall would be that we were such a bunch of shit students at school, especially my class JC1C. Lol so literally we had the smart kids, the cool kids, the ‘no-one’ kids, the gossip girls, the pretty girls, and the ‘idgaf’ kids. I still have no idea how could i pass JC1 when always played with my phone in almost every classes (and so did most of the rest) not to mention that it was “okay” for us to use our phone during tests and teachers  barely gave any fucks lolol. And i always bought rice and chicken nuggets (from different food stalls) almost every single day. Even my friends freaking complained how consistently unhealthy i was LOL.

Yeah, so things were pretty much okay during my JC1 year and again i didn’t take my studies too seriously and JC1  was the year in which i was pretty much fooling around.

I thought that i would stick around until i finish JC2 in PI campus but after JC1 i had a major change in my life. Because my dad wanted me to apply to UI in which i had to prepare for the entrance test with Indonesian curriculum, so i had to take extra lesson every week to catch up with the materials. Back then i was thinking that it would be difficult for me to manage my time in dividing time for A levels and Ujian Nasional so i thought instead of going to JC2, maybe it would be better for me to join GAC since they are more into projects and assignments plus, NO EXAM. Actually i have always wanted to take GAC but i thought my dad wouldn’t agree with me. After a simple discussion with my dad, the idea of joining GAC was actually approved by my dad and he wanted me to contact the school immediately.

So after i applied to the tutor place, i called RICS and told one of the staffs that i wanted to move to GAC instead of doing JC2. Then the surprise came in. The GAC program is no longer available in PI campus and if i insist on taking GAC, then i would have to go to KJ campus. That time i was completely shocked and had no idea what to choose.. just right after i’ve felt comfortable in PI campus, now i gotta move again to another campus? Not to mention that Kebon Jeruk is far away from my house (south to west Jakarta).

I was in dilemma at first but after i talked about it with my parents, they actually had little to no problem about it and not long after that, i was admitted to the KJ campus with all my documents ready to be transferred there. This turning point never crossed in my mind not even once, even i didn’t even dare to publicly inform my PI friends about it. So i had to deal with it and prepare for the best or worst..

Starting from August 2015 onward, my life was about to change a lot. I had to wake up so much earlier in the morning, i had to join the school car everyday and i had to sacrifice my weekends for lessons, meaning that i didn’t get much chance to hangout with my friends. Just thinking about it already made me feel worn out. But then i kept on telling myself to do my best on my last year and don’t be such a slack like i used to be.

On the first day of GAC, i had some expectations but not too much cause i didn’t want to feel disappointed just in case they became another flop. My first impression was KJ campus is very small with little number of students, teachers and staffs. It was not a problem for me cause i actually like smaller environment. My class itself only consists of 6 people, including me. I was quite surprised at first but i really liked my class even on the first day of school. Little did i know was that 4 of them were also students from PI campus before they moved to KJ campus just like me but with different reasons.

Learning from my past, i didn’t wanna repeat the same situation like my first day in PI campus so i tried to interact with my new classmates right away and i tried to act as confident as possible in front of new people in order to create a good first impression. It turned out to be much better than expected! They all welcomed me warmly and they’re all really friendly towards me. It’s like them giving me a green light and from that day onward, i became friends with them in no time.

GAC Level 1 was very fun. They had completely different curriculum and lessons. We had communication skills and study skills classes in which we pretty much learned “social and study skills” and no tests or exams, just logical thinking. The teachers are awesome! They taught us in the most interactive ways and they could relate to their students most of the time, giving us “teacher+friend approach”. Level 1 was indeed our best moment because we had so much leisure time, easy going classes and we got to get to know each other nicely like playing games, going out and traveling together. We were so united as a class and even the school knew about it (?).

It was all fun and games until things started to change as time went  by.. due to some conflicts our class couldn’t stick together as a whole and the unity was soon divorced. As a result, poop squad was born! Yes, my dorkiest-most random-weirderst-funniest-trippiest-squad ever! I’m not saying that we’re making somekind of gang but that’s just how things work in our class because there are only 6 of us. Anyway, this new squad is da bomb!  Hahaha they really are one of my most amazing and special friends that i ever have. These people really changed me a lot as a person and my life also. Everyday was spent with jokes and random talks about guys, food, puppies and even gross stuffs. We shared food to each other almost every day, and there were times in which we switched food with one another or just ordered for fast food delivery. WE LOVE EATING YASS. We love food so much that we always planned on going out just to eat lol. Then Christy would make a vlog from our trips. AAND we take soo many selfies. I was always in charge of taking pictures of whatever we do or wherever we go and publish them on facebook. My facebook has become my journal since i move to KJ, because i always post everything whenever we had some events going on haha i have potentials to be a great PR rite.

At first i was only fond of my classmates but day by day, i got closer with teachers and students from other grades too! They are all very friendly and it was such a pleasure getting to know each one of them because they are just that awesome! Since KJ campus is small in size, our community is quite small also but that means we are much more united. There was little to no awkwardness among each other and i really enjoyed all the good times that i had with every single students and teachers even though i’m not personally close with them.

Meanwhile, as the school term changed, GAC became much more difficult every level. In Level 2 and 3 there were no such thing as “time for leisure” because shit is about to get real. Yeah, our lessons were filled with more theories, a lot of readings, and a pile of assignments for every subject. Plus our assessment events that we had to deal with; either presentation, oral test, written test and the worst, reports and essays. There were times in which we had to stayback at school until late just to catch up with the AE deadlines. My sleeping hours were greatly reduced and i had little to no rest almost everyday just to finish my assignments on time. Not to mention with my super busy schedule, i had to manage my time for studying national curriculum and working on my assignments. I was pressurized with school and also my parents, because they expect me to do well for each.

Level 3 was hell for me though. It was one of the toughest phases in my life so far. Why? Because in level 3 we had shorter time to finish the whole time plus we had to do Ujian Nasional and my extra lesson schedule was changed from weekends to 6 days a week. Maybe you can imagine how much pressure that i went through, even i wrote a post regarding this. Not to sound arrogant but people know that i’m a top student and that i’m capable of going to UI if i really work hard on it. But what they don’t know is that i’m not perfect and that i’m actually not that good. I’m still a teenager with a lot of issues, not only with school but also with my family, friends and other relationships. So i had some major depression moments that i already cried at school for more than 3 times and for countless times at school. I thought of giving up some times after the hardships that i had to deal with. No one actually knew about it, didn’t intend to let people know since it’s very personal but yeah.. just because someone looks perfectly fine, that doesn’t always mean that they are strong on the inside. Because even the “perfect” person could have so many flaws and insecurities.

Anyway, my squad was always ready to cheer me up and i also had my teachers who were always there to support me. I really appreciate how much they actually care about me when i though that i was no good for them. Now i feel so loved, thank you very much.

Another year was about to pass and i wanted to make something memorable for the school before i graduate for real. So i came up with the Senior Year 2016 Project in which my classmates and i planned to sell symbolic hoodies and t-shirts for teachers, students and staffs. It was just a rough plan and we tried to make it happen, so it did. We managed to make our own designs, look for the vendors, and managed the distribution process. Although it was not all that smooth, eventually it was a success and we have contributed some profit for donations. I am very proud of our work and it was an impressive experience for the sake of my learning and career too.

Overall, i dearly love KJ campus so much and it was quite hard for me to leave the school because almost everyone has left a warm impression in me. I just couldn’t stop taking pictures with everyone on the last day of school haha oh and we even have notes on our wall where anyone can write us a message for the GAC people. Moving to KJ has given major changes in my life that i believe have made me a better student, friend and person.i would never ever regret moving to KJ campus and it’s definitely one of the best turning points of my life.

Now that i’m already graduated from RCS, i feel a bit sad and happy at the same time. I was no one and i had many gloomy memories at first but as time went by, i learned, i tried to be stronger and wiser, i pushed myself to do more and be someone better, then at the end, i had found a new home and another family that i belong to, and i found joy.  Something that i really wanted to get rid of has turned to something that i dearly treasure. All the memories, experiences and knowledge, i am truly grateful to what the school and its community have done to me.

No matter how many bad moments that i had in my story, they won’t change the ending and the fact that i survived. I may not have a nice start, but i had a great ending. And maybe this is what God had planned for me, all the hardships that i’ve experienced are actually what made me a wiser person now.